Thursday, October 15, 2020

My Schedule for AdobeMax

 I think I may have over-booked. 


Tuesday

Mastering the Essentials of Adobe XD — Part 1

What's New in Photoshop? Features, Time-Saving Tools, and More

 Photoshop for Designers: Getting Speed and Consistency in Creative Campaigns — Part 1

Introduction to Logo and Text Animation in After Effects — Part 1

Getting Started with Adobe XD

How to Be the Social Content Creator That Brands Love

Designing Appealing Characters with Adobe Fresco Using Shapes and Space — Part 1

An Introduction to Adobe XD for UI and UX Design

Wednesday

Promote Yourself and Uplift Your Brand Value with Adobe Portfolio

Adobe MAX Keynote

Bold New Strokes for Illustration and Painting

The Life of an Illustrator and Artist, or Being a “Painter Without a Boss”

 Illustrator Workflows Part 2: Increase Efficiency, Avoid Problems

Automating Photoshop: Indispensable Timesaving Techniques

MAX Sneaks

Create Awesome Artwork Anywhere with Adobe Fresco

 Photoshop for Visual Designers: Advanced Techniques and Tips

The Nine Most Common Template Challenges and How To Fix Them

Mastering Infographics and Visual Communication with Adobe Illustrator

 My Life-Changing Journey from 2D to 3D with Adobe Dimension

Essential Photoshop Tricks for Designers

Adobe Fresco Part 2: Creating Scenes, Color, Texture, and Effects

Adobe XD: Tips, Tricks, and Techniques to Up Productivity

The Art and Craft of Amazing Portraits

From Contract to Creation: Keeping Business Moving with Acrobat

Creating on Social Media: More Gain with Less Pain

Thursday

What Is Good Design? Moreover, What Is Design?

Lettering Design Master Class

What's New in Illustrator? Features, Time-Saving Tools, and More

Creating Thumb-Stopping Content for Social Media

Illustrator Workflows Part 3: Tips, Devices, and Extensions

Social Motion: Using After Effects for Social Media

Adobe Illustrator: Pro Tips, Essential Techniques and New Features

Friday, September 29, 2017

Packet of Urine

This article was a fun read. I think all articles should start with "Armed with a packet of his own urine..."

There's not really a happy place to go from there.

Armed with a packet of his own urine, the man gave the child a balloon.

Armed with a packet of his own urine, the boy entered the cathedral.

Armed with a packet of his own urine, John knew that this test drive of a Porsche 911 would end differently.


Monday, April 10, 2017

Real Finishes to Real Races

In order to win a trophy for Best Race Finish Photography, you should develop a few important skills:1) Hiring good models2) Understanding the human body and how it looks in motion:



3) Taking good, reality-based pictures. 

Once you have these skills mastered, only your dreams can slow you down.

Tuesday, January 24, 2017

Potato-Man

When life gets you down, think of this person.

He applied for a job where I work. The position is for Creative Writer, and he felt he was qualified, although he calls himself a Composer.

I kind of admire him and his attitude. He knows what the job was, and he did it. He knew he had to not swear, and not fall asleep, and he knows the consequences.

He's diverse in his skills, too. he can fill a hole with rocks, or with potatoes.

What I'm trying to say is, he is all of us, but he mostly is you.

Friday, May 01, 2015

Your Horoscope

Aries
People take notice of what you do today. Some of them will even get teary-eyed when you unveil the bellybutton lint you've allowed to accumulate and ferment into a very fine cheese. 

Taurus
A few extra things need to be done around the house today, Taurus. A few more letters need to be written, a few more cleaning chores should be done, and you might still want to dress the place up a little. And the smell must be addressed.

Gemini
Children may be a part of your day today. And a walrus tusk harvest is an important and beautiful thing that every child needs to see.

Cancer
Your mind is quicker than usual, so you can probably grasp some rather complex ideas. Also, the cocoon you've been waiting for 2 months to hatch is, in fact, a dog turd.

Leo
Don't get cocky. Real ninjas move in silence, like smoke, or a nice lasagna. 

Virgo
What begins with a sneeze will end up with your tattoo artist "accidentally" dragging his tattoo gun across your back and creating a beautiful panorama of Mario characters and scenes. Maybe bring along a witness. 

Libra
This will be a difficult battle of self-control. You will take the most perfect dump ever; a long symmetrical uniform log. Fight the urge to pinch off! In the end you will gaze at the upright monument; your safety wipe coming back snow-white. Glorious. Then the seizures begin.

Scorpio
A message from a friend could make your day, Libra. The good news may involve travel, money, or a love relationship. It could be "you have ulcerative colitis"

Sagittarius
Talk of traveling to distant and exotic places could come up at a gathering of family and friends, At this point you'll discover that Chinese women's breath smell of dry hair and boiled shrimp.

Capricorn
A busy and stimulating day is definitely ahead. Your boss will take all your dental benefits hostage until you answer his riddles three.

Aquarius
Get your camera charged and ready. There's a reason you've named your colostomy bag "SeƱor Stretchy"

Pisces
"It's better with bath fitters" is all the horoscope you need to know.