Thursday, June 09, 2005

 Posted by Hello

I'm fixing a hole

With the new tramp needing to go in the ground, I have a need for a 14-ft wide 4 ft deep hole in my side yard. So I decided to invite people over for a good dig. What kind of tunes do you put on a hole-digging mix cd? Obviously anything by Hole, and maybe Head Like a Hole by NIN. Didnt Aerosmith do a Hole to Heaven song? Anyt more suggestions?

Friday, June 03, 2005

Captions are the best because they help describe the graphic. Posted by Hello

Wednesday, June 01, 2005

The Story Behind Montgomery Q

It would be much easier and satisying for the viewer to see an actual site with the graphics and complete word-for-word story of Montgomery Q, the Crosscountry Dancing Menthol Cigarette, but that project hasn't been completed.

Montgomery Q is an illustrated storybook created by my friend Joel and I for our girlfriends. We recorded an ad-libbed story on tape, using all the titles of Love and Rockets songs for some reason. We tended to do odd things. There would be a click of a Snapple lid safety seal being popped when it was time to turn the page. I then illustrated it, and put the book together and gave it to them with the tape. The book still exists in Joel's archives somewhere, so once its scanned and cleaned up, it will go online for several people to enjoy.

Be warned: MQ is the dumbest story you will ever read in your lifetime. It's probably the dumbest story the human mind could create, even if we started now and were given unlimited time and resources.

Synopsis: Montgomery Q was a 6-foot living menthol cigarette. He rode a motorcycle, and discovered in his youth he was talented at ballroom dancing. At the urgings of his father (who planned to kill him) he headed to Nashville to enter a crosscountry ballroom dancing race. He wins, and the story follows his career as this odd sort of sportsman figure. He marries, has kids and the end of the story has him retiring. There's no "Rocky"-like comeback, or even a climactic race. The story is extremely entertaining for exactly 2 people (Joel, Me) and is a confusing pile of dung for all other readers.

I like the name, though.

The Hole and its Medical Implications

Hey hey. The kids ok.

The dimple/hole is "non-connective" which means it doesnt connect to the spinal column. Which means no surgery. He'll just have this really deep dimple in his buttcrack for the rest of his life.
My friend Scott said something which is absolute truth. Doctors will always tell you the worst case scenario FIRST. Is there a reason? Can they not say all the things it might be, and then say what the options for us are? Damn, that bugs.

So, if you have a bump, it's a cancerous goiter. Dimple is most likely spina bifida. And redness in the eyes? You've got yourself some Parkinson's, my friend.