See this mermaid? The day before, it was here in front of this mermaid, that the competition for the Sexiest Legs occurred. Those of you that have seen my legs can guess who the winner was. I got a medal, a Royal Caribbean hat, and frequent recognition and kudos throughout the rest of the cruise. Unfortunately, the camera was not functioning during the competition, so my erotic dance number was only captured in the hearts and minds of all those present.
A seagull pooped on my shoulder. It was a two-part poop, the first part falling on Kelly's chair. You can see it in the background.
Sometimes when we entered our stateroom, we found that the attendant had folded our towels into animals. I think I can do that. I've already taught myself how to make a dead cat that's been run over by a semi.
Even though the trip was pretty fun, I was overjoyed to see my kids again.
See this mermaid? The day before, it was here in front of this mermaid, that the competition for the Sexiest Legs occurred. Those of you that have seen my legs can guess who the winner was. I got a medal, a Royal Caribbean hat, and frequent recognition and kudos throughout the rest of the cruise. Unfortunately, the camera was not functioning during the competition, so my erotic dance number was only captured in the hearts and minds of all those present.
A seagull pooped on my shoulder. It was a two-part poop, the first part falling on Kelly's chair. You can see it in the background.
Sometimes when we entered our stateroom, we found that the attendant had folded our towels into animals. I think I can do that. I've already taught myself how to make a dead cat that's been run over by a semi.
Even though the trip was pretty fun, I was overjoyed to see my kids again.
29 comments:
Did you Veet before your cruise?
Pal I believe u have slimmed a bit. And now towel monkey has a whole new meaning.
It certainly does. I used to use "towel monkey" in an entirely different way.
"The towel monkey oozed down the back of my leg while a sense of dread filled my heart."
"The policeman asked for my identification so I pulled out my towel monkey. It was fortunate I had remembered it"
"The children have gone down to play with the towel monkey"
Which of these is ambiguous. Answer: one of them.
There was a towel monkey of reasons why Carrie made that comment.
With the north wind's chill inevitably comes the towel monkeys.
I could feel their rustlings, I could hear their playful laughter. I pulled them out of my nose, one by one. The towel monkeys were back.
What could I expect, being in the wrong area of town, and at this late hour? The gang members circled me slowly, flashing their grins and knives. Then I remembered my towel monkey.
Remembering that towel monkeyss find their way by following the scent of the towel monkeys in front of it, I licked my finger and slid it through a gap in the line, and then smiled when the confused animal before the gap began to search around, lost without his guiding line.
The double barreled towel monkey that Bill pulled out discharged the second it cleared the top of the bar. Kenny's stomach blew out from his back and intestines, bone and tiny bits of flesh showered the people behind him.
I took a bite of my towel monkey bread. It had lots of towel–the way I liked it.
The cab driver was unambiguously foreign. His accent was thick. His clothing was colorful and strange. But the biggest clue was the shape of his towel monkey.
Although we were never allowed to be alone together in a private place, we still saw each other. Our song was Prince's classic "With Towel Monkey Beats My Heart"
The numbing cold penetrated to the bone. The lake was wider than either of them had believed possible. They knew it was only a matter of towel monkey.
I tore into the towel monkey with all the enthusiasm of youth. Inside was the perfect gift: a book that I wanted real bad.
Believers that have seen the truth strive to bring the truth to everyone regardless of the costs. Believers will be spurned, prophets burned, and martyrs will die but the word of the Towel Monkey will be known.
Those who eagerly embarked on this journey did so for many reasons, hopes of religious freedom, to be reunited with their families who came on earlier voyages, or to simply begin new life in a virgin country which was said to be full of towel monkeys and opportunities.
The towel monkey explained repeatedly how to perform inversion sets using boolean operators and became frustrated when the only response from the class was apprehensive silence. "Forget it," he said. "I'm going home." Then the class erupted in applause.
I met Algonquin at the airport. It was hard to recognize him because he looked totally different. His hair was bleached, an extreme difference from his usual brown, and from his neck hung a squawking towel monkey.
I've never been one to try outrageous stunts. Bungie jumping, skydiving and rock climbing never appealed to me. But when I heard the reports of the towel monkey, all that changed
It's a towel monkey of an O, it's towel monkey Cheerios.
Last Sunday after brunch, I took a giant towel monkey.
The fun continues here
The towel monkey let herself out without another word, and I sat in the late afternoon silence alone. I considered how it felt to be a disposable instrument in someone’s personal debasement fantasy.
Holy Towel Monkey, I like your avatar, Dave!
It's a bunny with a pancake on its head.
I think that it adequately defines my overall character and personality, don't you?
Definitely
towel monkey
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