Monday, March 28, 2011

Epic Weekend in Review

My doctor told me I had until Monday to live (butt cancer), so we decided to pack everything possible into it. Friday I saw Sucker Punch with Corey. He and I are starting a band called 2 1/2 Beards. He bought my ticket, because that day I had drawn a tattoo of Saint Michael for his brother.

Sucker Punch was everything I hoped for, and maybe a little less. It had plenty of beautiful things that I loved, but it fell apart at the end. I'm a big fan of Emily Browning. I was worried that Vanessa Hudgens would ruin it, and I was correct in worrying about that. Zack Snyder decided to make her character the downfall of everybody else. Which was a shame. I didn't like the ending. All of his movies have disappointing endings.

Then we grabbed the kids and went to a hotel in Salt Lake so Mandi and I could go see Mozart Symphony #40 at Abravanel Hall. Mandi decided not to go, so I left her at the hotel and went by myself. It was insanely awesome. They started out with the overture from The Magic Flute, and the tears began. Then they played some pieces from Paul Hindemith. "Who's that?" you are wondering. Which is what everyone in the audience was thinking; as well as "what the hell?" It was like going to see

and getting

After intermission they went back to playing just selections from Mozart, so the rest was awesome. And the old dude next to me farted, then tried to act nonchalant while people 3 rows ahead of us were turning around with disgusted looks. That was awesome, too.

The next day we went to Ogden to the Dinosaur Museum. Oliver was scared of the robot dinosaurs.

Then I went surfing.

I didn't do well, but I ruled at body surfing as you can see.

We then took the kids rock-climbing. That was fun, but I was exhausted. I wanted to crawl into a bed and sleep for 5 hours. So it was a perfect time to go indoor skydiving. It was unfortunate that I didn't get any recording of this, apart from a blurry picture and a one-millisecond video. It fails to convey the awesomeness. The instructor took me way up high, around and round.

So it was the James Bondiest, balls-outiest, shredfest of a weekend I've ever had.

My doctor just called. It was just a GI Joe figurine showing up on the x-ray. I'm fine.


Prilla said...

First of all I would like to say WHAT THE HELL!?! Not cool Paul! I'm glad you had a good weekend, but I think you deserved the wipe out on the surf board for your unkind joke. Not even April Fools day yet!

BigJason said...

My favorite thing about Paul is that he is clinically insane.

Rachel said...

We totally did that vacation in Ogden, tons of fun. I love how you really captures our attention at the beginning with a fatal decease... great story telling as usual Paul.

Joel said...

Was it Scarlett or Snake Eyes? Or maybe Cobra Commander?!

Montgomery Q said...

It was Scuba Gear Snake Eyes

mandi said...

I should have got some vid of that old guy surfing. He really wanted to show everyone how it's done. And I wouldn't mind seeing the footage of the trainer doing awesome things at the iFly. Two medallion worthy recipients. You did good too, Paul. Oh Paul.

I enjoyed Jason's comment.

susan said...

I have seen x-rays of some freaky butt cancers. I hope their weekends were as completely awesome as yours.