Tuesday, March 20, 2007

Last Will and Testament


Songs Played at my Funeral: Parachutes (Mates of State) and Exquisite Dead Guy (They Might Be Giants)

I need every possible organ or tissue donated, and then an open casket, no matter how I die. Mandi will arrange my face pre-rigor mortis into the best Darrel face the world has ever seen. This picture will be on the front of the program, and in the paper.

After the funeral, I'll need to be cremated, because I dont want to pay for a burial plot. Or you can just put me in a dumpster somewhere. I dont give a crap.

Alex gets the comic book collection, and Maddie gets my dog stroller. Isabel gets rights to sell all my artwork. Joel gets my paycheck-making machine. Mandi gets...everything else.

4 comments:

Joel said...

PAYDIRT! I has been coveting that paycheck making machine. Why don't you come over for dinner sometime. I promise not to kill you.

sugarbritches said...

To save expenses could we just put you in a hefty bag and put you out on the curb? we could sing amazing grace as we drag you out there. I promise to wait until garbage day so my neighbors cat doesn't pick at you in the bag like he does when there is meat in the bag.

Sherri said...

I object! I have a letter in my possesion that clearly states " P.S. If I die, I leave everything to you." The letter begins with "Dear Sherri" which is ME!

Unknown said...

“I need every possible organ or tissue donated, and then an open casket, no matter how I die.” - I know of people of who want to donate their organs after death too. It's so nice of you to give your functional organs in order to extend the lives of those who are suffering. A selfless act indeed.

Trudy Nearn @ GenerationsProbate